Hello everyone,
It's been two weeks today since my Mom passed away and there is such a hole in my life, I just don't know how it will ever be filled.
I don't want to cry all the time and post " I'm feeling down again" type posts, but this is worse thing I have ever had to live through. I always knew this day would come, but it's something you just never are quite prepared for. I still can't bear the thought of going through her things. My brothers have said for me to just leave it alone until I think I can handle it and I appreciate their understanding and patience.
For instance, I was going to wash the clothes in her hamper in her bathroom the other day and I pulled the clothes, which was just a few of her shirts, out of the hamper and I smelled her presence. Her clothes still carry her scent. All I could do was cry and put the clothes back in the hamper. I just can't wash away her sent yet.
I go in my Mom's bedroom and just sit in there sometimes and listen. It may sound strange, but I can here conversations we had in there. I used to go sit in there when she was alive and we would just sit and talk. Now I go in there and relisten to our talks.
As I said earlier, there is a big hole in my life, my home, my heart. I am so blessed to have had a Mom that I had such a good relationship with and that I felt so close to. I am also blessed to have all the friends that have shown me such love and support through this most difficult time of such great loss.
Thank you all for that love and support. I wouldn't be able to handle this without you all in my life.
All About Lil Ole Me
From: Louisiana, United States
About me: I am married to a wonderful man, Tom, and have been for over 25 years. We have 3 kids, all grown and out on their own! YAHOO!!!! We also have a new granddaughter. She is precious. I love to travel and see new and different things. I would love to win the lottery, so I could buy a home on the beach, or an island all my own, so my husband and I could live there for the rest of our lives. Maybe we will just get a travel trailer and start moving around some. I would like that too! Hope you enjoy this blog and all the goofyness it will have in it. Have a Great Day! Jus4tday!
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Cindy we are here for you, so you post your real feelings and don't worry about it not being some happy gay post. Blogs aren't about posting some happy go lucky stuff to entertain people, blogs are for sharing your true feelings with the world. If you didn't talk (or write) about how sad you feel right now it would be unhealthy because you would be supressing it. The bible says there is a time to mourn and now is your time to mourn. Use your blog and your friends to help you through this by telling us how you feel and sharing memories of your mom. You are so blessed that you had a loving mother in your life. Celebrate her and your relationship with her.
I can understand the way you talk about her scent being there on her clothes and such. I remember smelling my grandfathers clothes some time after he passed so I could smell his pipe tobacco and remember a time when I felt safe and secure.
Have you felt your mom's presence yet? I felt my grandmother for a few weeks after she passed. I think she just wanted to be sire that I was okay. And I was.